The Last Deployment

May 9, 2011
In a chronicle of angst and self-discovery, Lemer, a member of the National Guard, describes leaving his lover and civilian life behind to serve as a gay man in uniform under the federal "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" mandate. Lemer, whose writing has appeared in literary journals and the anthology Twentysomething Essays by Twentysomething Writers, recalls feeling like an outsider, fearful that "I'm about to be discovered, taunted, ridiculed, and kicked out." Lemer, who served in Kosovo and Iraq, tells with sensitivity and boldness of his band of unlikely brothers pining after wives and girlfriends at home and single men getting drunk from loneliness. Lemer does not gloss over the violent nature of war and death in Baghdad, highlighting the valor of the men and women risking their lives. He survived seven years of service with honor and resolve, but his silence about his sexual orientation, with a touch of realistic fear, is a bitter testimony to what gays encounter in service to the nation. However, Lemer also emphasizes something positive he learned from his military years: self-respect and the ability to accept himself for who he was.